Club Groucho

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I tried to read a Murakami book while tired and ended up reading one from a parallel dimension
If you could befriend a concept then I am BFFs with sleep. What the evolutionary reason sleep exists literally no-one knows for sure, but whatever…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't ever give up writing
I am a lazy human being. The fact my free time is spent either in front of a monitor or a TV or a silver screen 95% of the time is good evidence of…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't manage Manchester United to victory (In the early 2000s)
Believe it or not, I used to be massively into football. As much as a kid whose family couldn't afford to go to matches but had access to all the sports…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't do something competitive professionally
The other day I had a very nice time hanging with friends, playing arcade games, throwing axes, shooting some crazy golf, bowling...And all throughout…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't do my exams again
'Tis the season of A-Level and GCSE results in the UK, something I find baffling. All the more power to those who managed to get through years of…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't own a Dyson fan
As a man who lives in the United Kingdom, I get to experience the yearly fortnight of unbearable heat. Where temperatures continue to be hotter than…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't be early to something
If there's one skill I'm glad I picked up as a teenager it was the knowledge that being early to something is pretty pointless. Because I couldn't be…
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CJ Francis
I couldn't be Rapunzel
I finally got a haircut after going through three lockdowns. I got my haircut only once in that time, I believe, at the hands of my wonderful…
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CJ Francis
Club Groucho
Club Groucho
A comedy newsletter that would happily have Groucho Marx as a member. But that's impossible because he died in 1977.

Club Groucho

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